I love to walk in the sunshine, I love to walk in the rains. I can scale mountains, I can soar high with the eagles. My life is a rainbow of smiles, tears, experiences, fears, hopes and dreams. I am a birdsong, I am a starry night. I am a woman, I am ME!
Dancing in the rain and singing away under clear blue skies with not a care in the world; sounds poetic, idealistic and totally impractical. However, deep down that is the essence of a woman, especially the daydreamer kind of a woman. Every woman longs to be free; free to follow the desires of her heart, to chase magical rainbows and spin impossible dreams.
I am a 21st century woman. I am educated and articulate, I have a job and a family. I walk the tightrope everyday and try and balance my work and home, my children and my friends, my in-laws, and my parents. It is challenging and I succeed but at what cost?
Keeping awake till 3 a.m. with a child tossing and turning because he is suffering from flu and very high temperature while the rest of the family sleeps peacefully. In my sleep deprived state it is quite an effort to look presentable and turn up for work. I end up reaching a little late and get a disapproving look from my boss. I try and explain my situation to him and I get a suggestion that maybe I need to stay at home since I can't concentrate on being a career woman. Brushing off the comment with a polite joke, I get to work and manage to stay awake till office hours are over. Endless traffic jams and a couple of hours later, I reach home to see a grim faced husband sitting in the living room with our son's head on his lap. He might have got in five minutes earlier but I get to hear how disappointed he is that I put my career before my family. Oh! I am a woman, I can deal with that.
I wear a dress and I party with my friends at night. Maybe, I enjoy having a drink and a smoke. Hey! That does not mean that people have the right to judge me and say I do not follow Indian traditions and that definitely does not mean my values are questionable.
Happy and chirpy one day, dull and gloomy the next, I have mood swings, I am a Woman! Putting on a brave front and facing the judgemental society is something that comes naturally to me. However, deep down I'm scared and lonely and need constant reassurance that I'm loved and appreciated. I am a a Woman! A wife, a mom, a daughter-in-law, a working woman; some facets of my personality but deep down I'm still the little girl who wants to be taken care of and needs to hold a reassuring hand.
Try not to judge me for the things I am unable to accomplish, look at those that I do. I love my work but that does not mean I love my family less. When my family needs me, work takes a backseat, but that does not give you the right to question my work ethics. Partying with friends is fun but celebrating festivals with family and relatives is equally important. If I stay at home one weekend and don't want to go out, it does not make me a boring old housewife. If I go out with my friends I am not a rebel. I have to live up to impossibly high expectations and I do it with a smile. Do take a moment to notice the unshed tears in my eyes that I camouflage so well. These are the tears for the ambitions and dreams I sacrificed, the freedom and carefree days that I relinquished in order to fit into your mould!
Whisper in my ears and tell me I am doing just fine. Give me your shoulder the day I decide to shed those tears. I can be the starlight, I can be the sunshine, I can be the rainbow, if you don't clip my wings. Love me for what I am, Celebrate me, I am a Woman!
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